What Your First Year of College is Really Like

College is an amazing time of change, personal development, and (at times) so much fun.

“You are going to have so much fun.”

“You are going to make so many new friends.”

“You are going to love it.”

These are the things people kept telling me my senior year of high school and the summer leading up to my first college semester. They weren’t untrue statements—I did have so much fun during college. I did make some of my best, life-long friends during college. I did love it.

But college is also incredibly hard work and full of challenges you may have never dealt with before. These are the things people don’t want to talk about, or admit, especially to their peers.

I felt as if I had just been dropped into a shark tank without knowing how to swim on that first day. I had spent my entire life living under the same roof in the same town for 18 years, and then one day I was dropped off on a university campus with hundreds of other students my age with little to no supervision, little to no idea where the campus buildings were, no transportation and no clue how to get around in the new city I was in (and no sense of direction still to this day), and no friends or family nearby for comfort—it was a HUGE change for my introverted self (at the time, I was an introvert).

I could hear other girls in my dorm laughing with each other—some of them even had groups of boys in their room. How were they making friends so fast!? What was I doing wrong? I remember feeling jealous of the boys too—they all traveled in giant herds, whereas girls seemed to travel in pairs or small groups.

It only took me about a week or two to figure out that practically everyone was going through a similar experience I was, they just were choosing not to talk about it.

“I feel like everyone has all these friends already—,”

“Oh my god, me too!”

“Really?”

This is how I connected with a lot of my early friends. Yay! Someone else feels the same way I do! :D

I remember feeling so betrayed after realizing that I wasn’t the only one. Why had everyone painted me this picture of how wonderful it would all be, when in reality most of them had likely suffered through the same lonely first days as I had?

People aren’t going to tell you that they’re struggling or they had a hard time.

Maybe for those older than me, it was because that’s not what they remembered about their college years or their freshmen year. But I was bound and determined to tell every upcoming college freshman that yes, it turns out to be an amazing life experience, but it is really hard when you first get there and things don’t fall into place immediately, like I thought they would.

And for those the same age as me, who talked about all their new friends, parties, boys and crazy fun they were having—they were either omitting, or lying.

I figured this out when me and one my new friends was talking to a girl who lived across the hall from her about a party we were at the night before. She was talking about the party and namedropping some boys in our dorm. My friend replied, “Yeah we were at that party too,” and proceeded to carry on a conversation about how fun it was.

We were at that party? You mean, the one where we walked ten blocks in the cold to get to, stepped inside the random house crammed with drunk people for about ten seconds, and then walked back out of it again because it was awkward and we didn’t know anybody? Oh, that party.

Now don’t get me wrong, college was one of the best life experiences I’ve had, despite it also being one of the hardest. I grew so much as a person in those four years and met some amazing people along the way.

My biggest piece of advice to college freshmen: throw out your expectations, be open to new experiences, and enjoy this time of uncertainty and endless possibly. Soak up every second, because it will all go by in a flash. And as much as you will be ready to move on to the next chapter of your life, you will likely find yourself becoming nostalgic when thinking back to the days of your alma mater.

#College